Phone Message: How Would You Like …

How would you like to drink a glass of drain opener? How would you like to become involved in a violent racial conflict? How would you like to have your teeth kicked in by a frozen boot? How would you like to eat a pile of ground glass? How would you like to slide naked down a razor? How would you like to suck on a chainsaw? How would you like to spend your vacation with Bill and Hillary Clinton? How would you like to leave a message when you hear the tone?